Thoughts, eavesdropping, concerns

Posted by spots (Singapore, Singapore) on 19 November 2008 in Miscellaneous and Portfolio.

So we went to Changi Airport today since it was thundering & storming. It was a great time--they had a little playground installed at B2 of Terminal 3, right next to the Crystal Jade Bakery where, to my delight, I discovered they sell sweet-top BBQ pork buns, the sort that are easily found in Chinatowns across the U.S.. Of course we also made a stop at the viewing gallery, and then had dinner at Swenson's. One good thing about making your kids eat regularly at 5.30pm is that when you eat out, restaurants are usually empty at 5.30pm and so, you and your kids can eat in relative peace and quiet, with no distractions or chaos. After dinner, we discovered that if you spend $50 of more at Changi Airport, you are eligible for a free train ride! (The Kiddy Train Ride Counter is at Terminal 3, 2nd floor). Well, that was certainly a nice way to top off the evening--the "train" was quite cool. Its facade was definitely train like and it had a cool whistle too. (But I secretly think it is actually one of those airport golf carts that has been converted to become a train haha!) Still, it was great fun for the kid to sit in the 2 "carriages" hooked onto the "steam engine" of the train as we took our free 5 minute train ride through the shopping mall of Changi Terminal 3. Then, it was home and to bed!

OK, but what I really wanted to blog about was this conversation we overheard at the playground, where we initially started our afternoon. It wasn't a conversation actually, but a monologue--this boy, about 5 or 6 years old was disturbing some of the girls (around his age) at the playground. We didn't have to try too hard to eavesdrop since he was quite loud. "Your sister become your brother, you stupid! I dowan to talk to you cos you stupid. You go away. You so stupid hahaha!"

Erm. I was trying to figure out if he even knew these girls, or whether they were strangers. The girls obviously did not want to play with him. It was funny cos he was actually shorter than any of them. But he was the loudest and clearly, a verbal bully. I should have been braver and told him to watch his tongue, but I can be a bit shy in public. Anyway, it ended abruptly when one of the girls hit her mouth (did the boy hit her? I didn't see.) and started crying. The boy stormed off like a celebrity in his gangster jacket. Where was he going? Where were his parents? Who knows? We didn't see him again.

A short while later, more kids came to play at the playground, this time older--they looked like Pri 3 or 4 kids judging by their height. Immediately, one of the boys started shouting at the other boy, "A come here STOOOPID! STOOOOPID!"

*roll eyes*
"OK, time to go Daniel, Benjamin!"

*sigh*

...

My pastor once mentioned that in his family, they banned the word "stupid". They made it clear to their children that this word was never to be used. And they never used it either.

I'm beginning to think I might apply this same rule to my kids....

Dad from Singapore

I agree that one should not label outright another as "stupid". But if it has to be done, I think it should be put across in a nicer way, like "I think you are capable of doing/saying it this (better) way". Teaching kids how to say things politely is important. You have been using this approach, I notice. So keep on emphasizing it to both Dan and Ben. I am sure they both enjoyed their play time at Changi Airport.

20 Nov 2008 12:06am

mel from Singapore

that word is banned in my home too! :)

20 Nov 2008 12:40am

JO from Singapore

its a bit difficult when we do not know the kids. But a friend once told me that in order to protect our children, we have to be bold and speak out-llike tell the boy how rude he was. when out kids see us reacting negatively to this word, they will understand that we do not like this word more than us repeating it 100 times.
I know other parents have other ways of reacting... let's share. :-)

20 Nov 2008 9:33am

skgoh from Singapore

In my house we use "silly" instead of "stupid." Christopher Robin calls Pooh "silly old bear" so it actually sounds quite affectionate.

Thanks for the tip about the playground in T3! Will bring E there tomorrow :)

20 Nov 2008 1:22pm

angela from Singapore

Hi Ruth... we banned de word 'Stupid' too... and nowadays, my 4 yr old son is de one who 'corrects' me when I used de word subconsciously... ;)

2 Dec 2008 4:01am

Nikon D50
1/15 second
F/3.5
ISO 800
18 mm

family
daniel
benjamin
changi
lau
outing

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